GN Commentary: May 26, 2009 - Is Marriage a Gamble?

The popular idea of romance claims that the key to happiness is FINDING the right person, but BEING the right person is far more important.

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Video Transcript

This is a special time of the year as the cards arrive in our mailboxes inviting us to join in celebrating graduations and weddings—two of the happiest times in the lives of young adults.  When they walk down the aisle in either ceremony, we wish them success and happiness as they move from one stage of life to another.

As an educator and minister, I have had the opportunity to share in both of these transitions for some outstanding young adults.  This past weekend my wife and I attended a graduation service, and the next day we watched as two of those graduates became husband and wife.  At times like that it's impossible to simply be an emotionally detached observer.  We care about what happens to them, and we understand the kinds of challenges they will face.

What are the chances this young couple will succeed—that their marriage won't end up in the ever-growing scrapheap of broken relationships?  If recent statistics are any indication, about the best they can hope for is a fifty-fifty chance that they'll still be married to one another ten years from now.  Thankfully, because of a series of choices this couple made, their chances for a successful, enduring marriage are actually much better than that.  Instead of becoming helpless casualties in the war on marriage, they made choices that will protect and strengthen their marriage.  The popular idea of romance claims that the key to happiness is FINDING the right person, but BEING the right person is far more important.

These two young people made their most important choice before they even knew each other.  They decided to live a moral way of life with God's instructions as their standard of personal conduct.  With that common foundation, they had a basis to begin building a relationship that can weather the storms of life.

Jesus Christ said, "Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock" ( Matthew 7:24-25 NIV).

The foundation alone is not enough, but without it all of our other efforts are futile.  What foundation are you building upon?  If you're not married yet, now is the time to carefully choose your foundation.  And if you are already married, it's time to examine your foundation to make sure you're building on the right one.

For GN Magazine, I'm David Johnson.